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Investigations, interrogations, and understanding human behaviour in its rawest forms have shaped almost my entire working career.
And the more I see trends in crime, business, or personal development, one truth stands out: theory and practice are two completely unique things.
On social media, I often hear so-called strategies about how to win in life or business. The advice sounds simple: just follow their steps and success will follow.
But I learned long ago that victorious strategies are not forged in theory; they are forged in practice, tested in real battlefields of life and work.
This realization did not come from a book or a podcast—it came on a blistering summer day in 1994.
We were deep in military training. The war had already consumed three years of my life, and yet the training for special forces was relentless.
That day, after marching 25 kilometers in the heat, sweating and exhausted, our drill instructors ordered us into a brick-layered room. Inside, 32 of us stood side by side.
From the ceiling, gas masks hung like silent warnings.
Before we could even orient ourselves, a canister of military-grade tear gas exploded.
Within seconds, the room was filled with burning fumes. Eyes stung. Breathing became fire. Panic swept the room like a contagious disease.
We had the solution right in front of us—gas masks—but none of us reached for them. Not one. Instead, fear suffocated logic, and we were “officially dead.”
Panic, not the gas itself, undid the thirty-two combat-tested soldiers.
Afterward, as we coughed and blinked through burning eyes, we were given theory lessons all over again.
The message was clear: even veterans of war need to relearn fundamentals if they want to win. In combat, as in life, forgetting the basics can cost you everything.
That day etched three rules into my life. These rules apply not only on battlefields but also in boardrooms, interviews, negotiations, and even personal relationships.
In war, failing to anticipate meant death. In business or life, it means missed opportunities or preventable failures.
Think of a client meeting, a job interview, or even a first date. Success doesn’t just happen—it requires preparation. Not only must you know the person you’re meeting, but you must also understand the setting, the timing, and the possible obstacles.
In our training, none of us anticipated why we were ordered into that room without equipment. We didn’t ask the “why,” and for that reason, we walked into panic unprepared.
Winning in life means anticipating moves before they happen. It involves conducting thorough research, planning ahead, and mentally preparing for potential outcomes.
Breathing seems automatic. We do it 20,000 times a day without thinking. But in moments of stress, anxiety, or confrontation, breathing becomes the first casualty.
When fear grips us, the body activates the fight-or-flight response: adrenaline floods, the heartbeat races, and breathing becomes shallow and rapid.
This hyperventilation leads to too much carbon dioxide leaving the blood, creating dizziness, tingling, chest tightness, and the terrifying feeling of losing control.
That day in the gas chamber, our breath was seized by panic. Instead of slowing down, instead of resisting the urge to claw at our burning eyes, we gave in. Panic suffocated discipline. And the result was failure.
The lesson? Control your breath, and you control the situation.
Practical techniques can help:
Box breathing: inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4.
These techniques are not abstract theory. They are lifelines. Whether facing negotiations, public speaking, or sudden confrontation, controlled breathing sends your brain a signal: you are safe, you are in control. And once the brain believes that clarity follows.
Winning is never about reacting blindly—it is about acting with purpose.
During confrontations, individuals frequently succumb to emotional traps. Someone challenges you, and instead of keeping focus on your larger mission, you react defensively. Suddenly, you’re adhering to their rules instead of your own.
Purposeful action entails maintaining constant focus on the ultimate goal. It means staying anchored in your key objective, whether in combat, business, or personal life.
In my training, we were reminded: when chaos strikes, don’t waste energy fighting meaningless battles. Channel your resources toward your true objective. This principle is universal—whether you’re negotiating a contract, facing workplace conflict, or standing up to personal challenges.
When you combine anticipation, controlled breathing, and purposeful action, you transform confrontations. You project calm authority, clarity, and confidence. And others will instinctively follow your lead.
Some might dismiss these rules as “military tricks,” but science backs them up. Research shows that deliberate breathing lowers cortisol, restores oxygen balance, and re-engages the prefrontal cortex—the part of the brain responsible for rational thinking and decision-making (Jerath et al., 2015).
In contrast, unmanaged stress responses hijack the amygdala—the brain’s fear centre—leading to irrational, emotional reactions (McEwen, 2007).
In business terms, that means the difference between closing a deal and blowing it. In life, it can mean the difference between building relationships and destroying them.
The Expert’s Edge: Lessons From Battlefield to Boardroom
I have spent decades investigating fraud, interrogating criminals, and working in both war zones and corporate boardrooms. And I can tell you this with certainty:
The winners are never the loudest. They are the most composed.
Fraudsters, scammers, and fake gurus—all thrive on exploiting panic and emotional reactions. They create urgency, push fear, and count on their target losing control. The antidote is the same as what I learned in that gas-filled room:
Anticipate their move.
This is why real expertise cannot be faked. It must be battle-tested. Theories without practice collapse under pressure, just as we soldiers collapsed when panic stole our breath.
To make these lessons more than stories, here is how you can put them into practice immediately:
Before your next meeting or negotiation—anticipate. Research the person, the context, and possible objections. Ask yourself: What might they do? What is my countermove?
When you feel anxiety rising—stop and breathe. Try box breathing for 60 seconds before you walk into the room.
When emotions flare in conversation—anchor back to your objective. Remind yourself: What is my purpose here? What outcome matters most?
After each confrontation—reflect. Did you anticipate correctly? Did your breathing help? Did you stay purposeful? This reflection turns theory into experience and experience becomes wisdom.
Life will always throw us into unexpected rooms filled with metaphorical tear gas—moments of stress, panic, or confrontation where theory alone is not enough.
But if you anticipate the move, master your breathing, and act with purpose, you can transform panic into power. You can project confidence when others crumble. And you can win—not by overpowering others, but by mastering yourself.
As someone who has experienced the horrors of war and boardroom confrontations, I can assure you that the calmest individuals emerge victorious.
So, the next time life throws you into chaos, remember:
Slow your breath.
This is the key to success in combat, business, and life.
